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Ethnic Cleansing: Why Nazis shouldn't make video games

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by DickEvil, Sep 16, 2016.

  1. DickEvil

    DickEvilMember Forum Member


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    Sep 16, 2016
     
    From Rock against Communism to Hammerfest, Neo Nazis and all of their special buddies have always tried to be hip with the kids and connect with the youth in any way they could. Going through Oi! music was more or less a success and the internet has been used with great efficiency at recruiting naive young dumbasses into their movement... but something here is missing.

    Video games. All the kids love them and all the parents are afraid of them, what's not to love? Why not take advantage of that?

    Ethnic Cleansing is why. A first person shooter released for Microsoft Windows in the early 2000's by Resistance Records. It's... bad. It's really fucking bad.

    The plot concerns a Jewish takeover of the United States (even though the Jews supposedly run everything to begin with) and something to do with a Jewish lady who was important at the time. That's really all you're given. I mean, you could argue that FPS games didn't normally have a plot but this came out after Marathon and Half Life and around the same time as Deus Ex, but back to the main topic.

    So you play as either a Nazi Bonehead or a Klansman. You don't get to choose before the game starts and there's no gameplay differences or anything like that, it just says "In the magical world of video games you can be ANYTHING!" and just leaves it at that. Hey, at least they were being culturally diverse, you know?

    Well the first thing you notice is that the graphics look like a Nintendo 64 game was ported to the PSX and then recorded footage played on a VCD on the Sega Saturn. Basically they really fucking suck. The draw distance makes Silent Hill look like Grand Theft Auto 5. The gun you have is probably an M4 or something but I don't know what it is because the model is fucking horrendous. The textures are blurrier than the porn films at a Mormon hotel chain and the level architecture makes Wolfenstein 3D look like Crazy Stairs. The first image you are greeted with is a poster on the wall of a little white girl with the phrase "WANTED: A FUTURE FOR WHITE CHILDREN" printed on it. After leaving your white stronghold/amateur meth lab/mother's basement you leave your house and are immediately riddled with bullets by Mexicans and black dudes. The game then crashes because the designers didn't know how to code a game over script. I mean they're just weaboos from /pol/, you can't expect them to be Bill Gates, cut them some slack.

    Well after restarting the game and cowering behind the wall like a Traditional Youth Party member after stabbing an old lady for no reason you're finally able to leave your Fortress of Euphoria and discover that the character models for the enemies are even worse than System Shock 2's. The Mexicans are just brownish people wearing sombreros and the black guys are all just black people wearing a shirt with the word "nigz" written on it. The Mexicans constantly say "Si Senor" over and over again and the black guys just make monkey noises. At this point I would have thought it was some prank made by that one guy who also made Clown Prince Rises and Bullet to the Head of the NRA but this is an actual attempt at creating something. According to the game manual the sounds were recorded from "ACTUAL NEGROS" so at this point the fact that the game is so fucking terrible and their pathetic attempts to be edgy overshadow the fact that it's Neo Nazi propoganda.

    Speaking of the sound guess what you hear? A RAHOWA cover of "When The Boats Come In" originally by Skrewy Driver... excuse me, Skrewdriver. That's it. A record company made a game that had one song in it. That loops. And it's a shitty thrash cover of a shitty Oi! song in shitty .WAV quality. Shitty vocals and shitty mixing and shitty solos. It's not very good is the point I'm trying to make.

    On top of all this I can't beat it. I cannot beat the game, it's fucking impossible. Due to the low draw distance and the shitty controls (zsxc are used for movement instead of wasd because fuck you, that's why) it's impossible to actually make any progress whatsoever. On top of this the enemies can shoot you from the other end of the map and you die in like three hits. There's no health powerups, no extra weapons, no armor. Nothing, it's just you, a melted Super Soaker and your fierce determination and loyalty to whatever Norse god sounds cool enough for you to worship at that time. But hold on... you're supposed to be playing as a genetically superior white super soldier? You know, like Hans Grosse from Wolfenstein or something. What kind of shit is that? Instead of a highly trained Aryan Nations shock trooper you play as some random fuck... so basically a highly trained Aryan Nations shock trooper. Never mind, that makes sense so it's canon.

    You want to know what the worst part is? It isn't free. I had to pirate this shit. If you want to buy it you have to mail order it directly from Resistance records. How much does it cost? Five bucks? Ten bucks? No. FOURTEEN DOLLARS AND EIGHTY EIGHT CENTS.

    Yeah, I get it, the whole 14 words thing and all that bullshit but come the fuck on. when the game is that shitty that isn't clever or funny, that's just being a fucking smartass.
     

  2. punkmar77

    punkmar77Experienced Member Staff Member Uploader Admin Team Experienced member


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    Nov 13, 2009
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    What did you really expect from the master race? I mean all obvious racist lyrics aside just listen to the quality of the music in any of the genres they have infiltrated, its absolute shit. For the most superior humans they really leave a lot to be desired talent wise..